Where am I right now?

In San Francisco for work. The view from the 25th floor of the hotel is pretty nice. The $300 room is pretty snug, but I like the window. Right on the edge of China Town and about a half mile from the office near the Bay Bridge.

Ate lunch at the San Francisco Fish Company in the Ferry Bldg today and had the worst fish tacos of my life. The fish had obviously been cooked a few days before and warmed up in the microwave or something equally wretched about 5 minutes before. It was tough and tasteless. I ate three bites and threw away the lunch that cost me $9.50. Kevin had the same thing and his was terrible too but he was starving and finished it anyway.

There was a fantastic spider sculpture that I will take a picture of the next time I go by with my iPhone. We had amazing yummy gelato at Ciao Bella (not the overpriced, mediocre Italian place in Edina).

My boyfriend has surgery tomorrow for his broken collarbone. And his birthday is on Thursday.

I did the du

Today was Oronoco Duathlon, Winterbegone Duathlon. Their slogan was, do the du. I really dislike duathlons. Prior to triathlons, I thought duathlon would be just the thing, because I was against swimming. But then I actually did a duathlon and decided that anything that made me run twice was straight from my worst nightmare! And on the way, I've come to discover that I enjoy the challenge of the swim in a triathlon. I'm so new to the sport that I constantly make improvements (when I actually practice) and I'm always better the next race I do.

But it's early in the year and I decided to sign up for some duathlons to help me ease into the season. And it's good I did. Can't be in denial when you see the numbers. The course was 2/13/2 miles.

I was 42/92 overall, 11/45 women and 4/9 in my division. I don't think anyone really competitive showed up or I'd have been further down the lists with these numbers:

Run1: 21:07 (10:34/mile)
Bike: 48:27 (16.1mph)
Run2: 24:33 (12:17/mile)

Short version: I ran with energy on the way out but apparently not with enough because that was slower than I'd planned.

The bike was harder than I'm used to it being. It was a rolling course with some wind. Both of my inner thighs cramped making it hard for me to push up some hills. That's never happened and I attribute it to some ongoing issues with my lower back that has been linked to weak hips and hamstrings. But I tried to ride strong when I wasn't cramping. However, that's still the slowest time I've ever turned in on the bike. Even my first Gear West Du had me at 17.7 mph and that's not an easy course either. I can tell I don't have the booty power I had even last spring. I know what it feels like when I stand up and power up a hill, passing people with ease. I tried to do it a few times today and my legs were like, "who are you again what exactly do you think you're doing? Sit your ass down!"

I was kind of thinking that the cramping was a free ticket to skipping the second run. But I compromised with myself and decided to just not worry too much about stuff and take the second run easy. I got off the bike and my legs felt totally numb! Crazy! But after a quarter mile they shook out and I jogged along looking forward to things being over. I finished and was happy to finish. I worked pretty hard although possibly not as hard as I could have.

But I had the creds for a decent showing. I was wheezing and coughing most of the way back to Minneapolis and coughed well into the afternoon. I was too tired to cook dinner tonight like I planned, so we splurged and had Jakeeno's Pizza and I had a whole bottle of Breckenridge EPA with it. Yum. And I'm stiffening up. So my numbers were not what I wanted, but I think not from lack of effort.

I've got some work ahead of me to get back into fighting trim. But I'm feeling pretty motivated. I recommend the Oronoco Duathlon. Rolling course but not demoralizing, and the road course was smooth with light traffic and a county sheriff at every left turn. Aside from starting late, it went off smoothly from my point of view. Good way to start the year.

Do You Rehearse?

Every time I get ready to go into a coffee shop, I find myself rehearsing my drink. Walking through the airport, driving down the road, etc. Quad venti skim cappuccino (starbucks). Medium skim cappuccino(caribou). Triple medium latte (Spyhouse). I always feel like a dork when I realize I'm doing it and try to stop. But then I walked into Starbucks here in Ann Arbor the other day thinking about something else. And when the chick at the counter asked me what I wanted, I gave her a blank, panicked look, realizing I had no idea how to order what I wanted because the words weren't prepared in my mind. I finally stuttered out grande. uh skim. triple. latte. NO wait, cappuccino. So I guess my rehearsal isn't so crazy after all. Am I the only one?

Guess where we spent our evening?

Fresh Kit

I ride my bike. It's what I like to do. I have a big, long rambling (boring) discussion of Hell Week that I started the other day on the plane to Michigan and will try to get it up sometime this week. But this weekend, I rode my bike. Twice.

I know that's not really news. But it is kinda. My bike fit revolution was last October and I got to ride a few times before winter set it, but it's still kind of a novelty to get out and ride with only happiness. I am desperately out of shape after a year doing the minimalist biking thing though. Hopefully even with this crazy travel schedule I can get out on my bike enough to make a difference. The only two things in my life I've ever found to make a diff with my fitness level are weights and biking. Even better if I can do them together.

Yesterday I just went out for an easy spin. Wanted to see what things felt like a week after Hell Week. You guys know I'm riding a Specialized Toupe now right? I didn't buy it because it was Carbon or light or anything. Although it's got one of the sexiest profiles around, I bought it because my bike fit guy Chris Balser went on and on about how awesome it was and he sent it home with me on a trial basis after our first fit session.

I just gotta say, I love it. The sign of a good saddle they say is that you never notice it's there. I rarely notice this one. When I do, it's like sitting on a flat supportive surface that is just kind of there. The only time I do notice it in a bad way is later in the day. If the ride goes over 4 hours or if it's the 3rd day in a row, I start to feel some direct contact between the saddle and my sitbones. But otherwise, I'm like Goldilocks. I tried about 10 different saddles over the last two years and this one is juuuuust right.

Little wet out yesterday. Got home with speckles of mud splatters on my virgin Birchwood jacket.

Today I went out and attacked stuff. I'm pretty slow right now and it's embarrassing. I have a couple of issues with the bike that aren't necessarily directly related to my current ability. One: I'm lazy. I'll gear down and spin up a hill unless I'm with someone who will drop me if I try that sorry trick. Two: When I *am* trying to get up hills, I often get all the way to the top with a good bit of speed and energy but then it's like the little thing in the lightbulb that pops. I all of the sudden have nothing left. I worked hard to get there, but now I can't do anything. My legs are jello.

So today I did three things: required myself to go up the hills and rises above a minimum mph, avoiding the laziness trap and then not allowing myself to slow down when I reach the top. I made myself keep going. I also stayed in the big ring unless it was absolutely necessary to go down. It was mostly fun and I had the added bonus of hitting lots of green lights that never usually happen: lights in S Mpls along with the lights along Delaware, even Hwy 55 (Or whatever it is there).

Then I came home, stretched, bathed and iced my knee which has been bothering me a bit. I was supposed to go to a triathlon team meeting kickoff tonight, but I miscalculated my biking time and it was already half over by the time I was cleaned up. I suck.

But I have to say it feels good to be back on two wheels again.

Dead Animals

Can someone please tell me why people are hanging dead animals on fence posts in Texas?

Soooo...what's the plan?

Uh....plan? So running and biking a lot aren't enough? I have to have a plan too? I'm afraid I'm mostly living plan-free these days. I tried to have a training plan over the winter and couldn't stick to it. I signed up for training peaks in January hoping that it would help me build something that looks like a plan. But training peaks doesn't work so well, in my opinion, for triathlete training.

For one thing, it ignores the fact that some of us live in snow covered climates. So I got instructions in my training plan to do shit like, runups--on grass. Also, unlike a cycling plan where it plans out your week, with triathlete plans, it just gives you a long list of workouts based on your hours per week and requires you to plug it in. Then after I've done that, I have to plug in my yoga workouts around it. It's a huge hassle. I keep coming back to Training Peaks but I wander away pretty quickly each time.

Then there's the complication of hotel living 3 days a week. I've been kind of falling into a default, treadmill run plan when I'm traveling and doing weights at least once and then wedging in another weight session, trainer work and yoga when I'm in town. This actually adds up to not enough time spent working out. Hopefully that part will change with the advent of warmer biking weather.

It helps to have goals. Here are mine for the year:

Survive Hell Week and hopefully get biking fit
Oronoco Duathlon, end of april
Gear West Duathlon, mid-may
Buffalo Sprint, early june
Minnetonka Sprint, mid june
Minneman, early july
Biking Colorado, mid-july
August half marathon, unspecified so far (possibly europe, stay tuned)
Half Ironman, mid September near Spokane, WA.

This last is a big goal for me. It's important to have goals. Or it's too easy for some of us to slack on our training. I'm still worried about my condition though and how my back is going to affect training. This week in Texas will be telling about the rest of the season. If it doesn't kill me, I will be able to safely say that I can train for, and complete, a half-ironman in 6 months.

I'm feeling a little lost and unfocused this year. I am not motivated to swim alone. I would be better if I had someone to do it with. But everyone I know swims better than I do so I feel like the annoying younger sister and don't want to force anyone to swim with me. So mostly I don't swim. I would probably profit from more coaching lessons. But again, no one to go with or share the expense and the coach I went to before was nice, but not so good at explaining how not to do things wrong. He would say things like, "you're doing X, don't do X." But I couldn't get an explanation on how NOT to do X. So I gave up. I guess I'll get back in the pool and flail on my own soon and comfort myself with the fact that swimming is the least part of a triathlon.

I'd like to have a coach or personal trainer help me set up some training plans or something since I can't seem to figure this stuff out on my own. It would be helpful to be accountable to someone besides myself since I don't seem to be a very exacting taskmaster. But where do I find one? I can go out and pick one at random from a website. Or I can pick one at random from my gym and hope they understand multisport. I really don't know what to do. And so I sit here, muddling through by myself wondering what to do.

What do you think I should do?

In the meantime, I'll just keep biking and running a bunch.

Tantrums

There were at least four children having gut busting, lung bursting, eye popping tantrums at the new SuperTarget on 66th in Richfield last Sunday. I'm not joking. Now, granted, I should know better than to visit the store on a Sunday, but I don't always have the luxury of going at 9:30 on a weeknigh, which is when I prefer to go.

One little boy was the worst. There were two women and they had somewhere 3-5 kids between them. I ran into this little group over and over in the store. And the place is not small. And I could hear them coming from aisle away. The little boy sat on the kiddie bench under the cart handle screaming (not exaggerating here), "I wanna drive" over and over and over. Top of his lungs. The entire time I was at the store. The women just ignored him.

I went by them at one point and when he looked at me, I wanted to say, "you know, little boys who cry all the time go to hell." But I didn't. Another wasted opportunity.

VS - wtf???

So I'm checking out the tv schedule for the tour of california this morning. Aside from Today and next saturday, all of the broadcasts are at 10pm Central or later. What the fuck is up with that? That's 11pm EST too btw, which is where I'll be stuck for the next 4 days. I guess that pretty much means no tour for me!

On my way to baby-free living

This morning I popped 10mg of Vicodin, 1000 mg of Acetominophen and drove to the gynecologist. When I got there, they shot me full of another muscle relaxant and then I sat in the waiting room for 30 minutes waiting for everything to take effect.

I was then ushered into a room with a large flat panel monitor and a table with stirrups. The doctor and 4 other people were in the room. As usual, we started with a freshly refrigerated speculum. They sent a flexible camera up through my cervix into my uterus where it helped him place a tiny titanium spring in each tube. Over the next three months these springs will expand to deny access to anything trying to work its way up inside. It's pretty neat. No hospital, no anesthesia, no incision, no downtime. I plan to go running later today.

And no babies. Ever. That's the best part.

www.essure.com

Why do I Live Here Again?

Assimilated

It's been a rough week. Remember last fall when I washed my RAZR? Well, I never replaced it and have just been using my Blackberry for everything. This Tuesday my Blackberry died. I've been living phone-free for 5 days. We are so spoiled. Surgically attached to our communication devices, we can no longer function when deprived. Informed that it would 1-2 weeks until I got my new Blackberry and also that it would be the same outdated old model they gave me 18 months ago, I bit the bullet.

I gave in. I spent a while this afternoon bent over letting AT&T and Apple take turns with me. After giving up any remaining virtue and a stupid amount of cash, I walked away with one of these:



Actually, it's pretty neat. I'll let you know how it works out. If you had my old phone number, the one starting in 850, it's active again.

Driving the HHR - Like Being Punished

I travel for work. Everyone knows that right? When I don't travel, I sit at home and work in my pyjamas, developing shitty posture that ruins my running. It's a pretty good gig if you can get it (aside from the chiro bills).

But I gotta tell you, traveling isn't all that. Unless you're Bill Gates, you don't get to travel in a private jet and be driven around in Towncars or stay at the World Grand Muckety Muck hotel. All too often you're squashed in a coach seat with a fat man sitting next to you, his elbows jutting a foot out from each arm rest. Sometimes you sit on the plane for an hour while they do an unscheduled repair and the taxi out onto the jetway to get deiced and then get back in line to take off. This usually results in the destination gate being changed as well. Last time that happened, they didn't have a landing crew to get us off the plane, so we sat there, while I nearly peed my pants.

Today we landed and apparently there was a shortage of NWA Jetway operators at DTW. The captain got on the intercom and informed us that he'd called 4 times and was assured that someone was coming. And that's all he knew. So we sat on the plane for an extra 10 minutes waiting for someone to let us out. Exciting, eh?

I drive a lot of different cars as a result of traveling for work. I prefer to drive a manual, of course. But rental companies don't provide those. So I drive shitty 4 cylinder automatic, american made, ugly ass cars 99 times out of 100; usually with the horsepower of one sad, growth-stunted, retired, glue factory candidate horse.

I rent from National. If you're an Emerald Isle customer, the shuttle bus drops you off at the car lot and you just pick what you want to drive off in. If you're lucky, you might get something fun or at least acceptable to drive. Usually this involves a 6am flight for me because of the time zone change to Detroit If I show up after 10, almost everything is gone.

I managed to snag a leather G6 with heated seats last week when my plane was late and I got to the rental lot after 9:30. Week before that was an optionless Corolla. In Phoenix I got a fun yellow Mustang all week. That's probably the best I've ever done. Over Christmas we had a Pontiac Vibe, which is supposed to be super sporty and fun to drive...if it were a manual. The automatic was pretty pathetic.

Cars that are the least bad to drive: Dodge, FTW. The Avenger is cute and pretty quiet and I drove a Caliber once that felt pretty zippy. One week I got a Grand Prix, which was horrible. It drove like a boat. But this week, oh yeah, this week's car takes the cake. I didn't get to the rental lot until 1pm. There were like 10 HHR's and a PT Cruiser touring left on the lot. So I sucked it up and grabbed an HHR.

But seriously, these "cars" are like punishment to drive. Like God hates me or something. Someone needs to just mercifully put these cars down. I mean first of all, they are just hands down, ass ugly. It's like a designer at Chevy said, how can I make the nastiest, ugliest ghetto station wagon minivan THING and then market it. And they pooped out the HHR.

To get up to highway speed limit of 70, I had to floor it. The little engine screamed in agony, wept huge tears and begged me to never do that again. And the design is like a nightmare. I pulled up to the exit booth to show the guy my car tag and license and couldn't find the power window switch. Why was this? Because they moved it over to the bottom of the center console with a dumbass set of graphics to tell you which button to push.



How annoying would that be if I'm actually driving down the road? Combine this with my need to raise the seat in order to see well and I can barely reach them. I also found myself fumbling for my coffee in the cupholder. There's a fricking armrest like on an easychair or something so the armrest is eternally in the way of reaching for anything in the center. No cupholder in the door.

Hands down, the Chevy HHR sucks. I bet National got a super good deal on the little bastards which would explain why the lot was still full of them this morning. Note to self, even a PT Cruiser would suck less than this.

Disconnected

November: Thanksgiving (road trip to Des Moines), Cross Nats(road trip to KC), Flight to Detroit
December: Two flights to Detroit including an extra long stay for Xmas.
January: 4 flights, 1 to Phoenix, 3 to Detroit.
February: I get on another plane to DTW tomorrow.

But hopefully it's the last for a while. All the travel is making me feel disconnected from things. After going away, all I kind of want to do is snuggle up with my kitties and my boyfriend when I get home. Also there's the laundry to do and the house to clean up and the 80 million expense reports to submit so they don't take away my corporate credit card.

Since I came home from Phoenix I have been to see a chiropractor 5 times. She has made some serious adjustments to my running stance and technique and given me some drills to strengthen my hips. She also performed a session of acupuncture that was not the trauma I thought it might be. It was kind of like being a live voodoo doll.

So apparently I have been running in a hunched position that has torqued my back into premature old age. I though I had learned enough about running to have a fairly efficient posture. I even read some stuff last year about how to make sure your arms swing freely when running.

Apparently I can't learn from books. She stood me up straighter and made me run on her treadmill until my arms did what she wanted them too. This hurt my upper back and shoulders the first week I ran like this. Then it stopped. Friday she corrected my running technique and told me to pick up my feet and pull through more. I knew about this, but again didn't realize I wasn't doing it.

Yesterday I ran on the track for the first time since Phoenix. It's been treadmill city for me since most of my running takes place in hotels these days. My run was so much amazingly better. I ran 5 miles quickly and more happily than I have all winter. And I'm pretty sure it's the first time in forever that I actually said, "I had the BEST run today! It was awesome!" So here's to some good running training going forward.

I'm trying to read everyone's blogs still although I usually get a couple days behind during the week. But I am still following everyone and trying to keep up with the trash talking. 5 weeks to Hell Week. I don't feel ready. But I'm excited to give the reconfigured bike a long workout and hope that my Assos cream can give me better love than the Chamois Butt'r of yore. I have a few pieces of news coming up that I'm excited to share. I will try to get a post or two in more often and stop being so lazy.

Drop. Your. Sword.

I'm in Phoenix. For a marathon. P.F. Chiang's Rock n Roll Arizona. That's the plan I hatched again this year to help with late fall and winter training. Run a marathon. Live in fear. Maintain fitness. There's only one problem. I didn't live in fear, possibly because I had very little fitness to maintain at that point. Instead I had lots of excuses. Despite the fact that they were legit, they were still excuses. My work/travel schedule was interfering with my running. I was suffering from random back stiffness that eventually morphed into full time discomfort in my lower back and legs.

Truthfully I have been having lots of problems with my lower back. I have quit running in the morning when I get up because it's completely immobile. I've taken to doing yoga podcasts in the morning in my hotel rooms to help with stiffness during the day. I am truly in bad shape and have finally decided to contact a chiropractor to whom I have been referred.

The back pain has had me very worried about my ability to even complete the half marathon. We walked 5 blocks to the expo for packet pick up yesterday and it hurt just from that. It hurt when I got up this morning. I was worried.

So here we were. Me and Jen G. Living it up in a hotel room together in Chandler, just south of Tempe where the races end. This was her first marathon and she was nervous for that. We were up at 5am this morning and out the door at 5:30 to Starbucks. Breakfast was a quad shot skim capp and a plain bagel. We drove to Tempe where we boarded a shuttle bus for the start line in Downtown Phoenix. This all still before we'd even made it to the crack of dawn.

At the startline, I walked around the booths with drinks and nanners and coffee and felt the energy everywhere and was suddenly disappointed that I wasn't doing the full marathon. I thought about trying it anyway, thinking I could just take it slow. But common sense took over and I knew I'd probably cause a real injury if I tried to run 26.2 with my training base. Still, I felt a little let down and disappointed because I hadn't met my goals this winter.

We watched the marathoners take off at 7:30 and then I stretched for a while, cracked my back with some spine twists and checked in my bag, giving up my sweatshirt to the bag check--the only thing keeping me warm. Then it was just me, my shorts, tank top and Shuffle, jogging over to the starting line.

Holy cats! Like 20,000 people or more do the half marathon. I seeded myself way back in like corral 18. A long time ago, at my first half marathon, my friend Shawn told me, "Everyone you pass, grasshopper, you steal their energy and make it your own." I don't necessarily believe this, but I can tell you from experience that having people pass me all day long and having several pace groups drop me last year in the marathon was pretty demoralizing. So I tried a different strategy today. In the end, it probably resulted in me adding an extra mile of horizontal running as well :)

I had a lot of time to think this morning in the corrals. They were wave starting to give people running room so there was a few minutes between each corral start. I was in place about 10 minutes early and it took my corral 38 minutes to get to the start line.

As I stood there, music in my ears, trying to remember to engage my core which keeps my lower back from hurting, my eyes were closed and I had my hands pressed together close to my body (it was cold and shady). I thought about what brought me here today. Last year, I thought of the Miami Marathon as the end of my training season. I considered it a time to lollygag and recover. Unfortunately I never really took control of my training after that. I realized that it has been an entire season of being disappointed in myself for not meeting my goals.

First there was Hell Week which did have lots of riding, but there was also some unbridled eating and drinking as well. Over the months my eating and drinking habits declined. I got lazier in my training. My bike didn't fit causing pain, saddle sores and a reduced enthusiasm for riding. I knew I was losing fitness but somehow lived in this fantasy world that I could pick up where I'd left off last winter any time I wanted. Yet I continued to eat scones and drink wine far too often. Working at home all summer kept me in lounge clothes so I never noticed how my work clothes stopped fitting.

2007 was riddled with laziness, failures and aimless direction. This morning I vowed that today's race is not the end of 2007's poor training season. Today's race is the beginning of 2008 for me. I was going to take this race and make it mine. I wasn't going to sit back and let it defeat me. I wasn't just here because I couldn't think of a reason to get out of running. I wouldn't give up or drop out and my back wouldn't stand in my way.

As corral 20 took off at the start (I'd stopped to retie my shoes and lost two corrals), I was cold and my back still hurt and my legs were stiff. My feet didn't feel so well either. But experience has taught me that a lot of this stuff will dissipate once I'm warmed up. I ran about 3 and a half miles and sure enough, I started to feel better. What really surprised is that, once warmed up, my back didn't bother me either. This is starting to confirm my suspicion that something else is tweaking the connective tissue back there.

But right before 4 miles, I decided that I didn't care any more! I was mad! I am in control of me, not random body pains. I had resolved to that point to run comfortably and think of the day as a training run to avoid hurting myself further. But I wanted more. I haven't run a race and put myself in real pain for a long time; not at all this year. All of 2007 was about going just fast enough to get by. Well, not today by god. I challenged my body to a duel. To the Pain. Not to the death because I'd like to continue doing triathlons in 2008, but to the Pain.

All of this reflection this morning made me think of The Princess Bride and the passage where Westley intimidates the prince into surrendering without ever moving. Don't ask me how my mind segues. I have no idea. I just work here.

Prince Humperdinck: First things first, to the death.
Westley: No. To the pain.
Prince Humperdinck: I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase.
Westley: I'll explain and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon.
Prince Humperdinck: That may be the first time in my life a man has dared insult me.
Westley: It won't be the last. To the pain means the first thing you will lose will be your feet below the ankles. Then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose.
Prince Humperdinck: And then my tongue I suppose, I killed you too quickly the last time. A mistake I don't mean to duplicate tonight.
Westley: I wasn't finished. The next thing you will lose will be your left eye followed by your right.
Prince Humperdinck: And then my ears, I understand let's get on with it.
Westley: WRONG. Your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "Dear God! What is that thing," will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.
Prince Humperdinck: I think your bluffing.
Westley: It's possible, Pig, I might be bluffing. It's conceivable, you miserable, vomitous mass, that I'm only lying here because I lack the strength to stand. But, then again... perhaps I have the strength after all.
[slowly rises and points sword directly at the prince]
Westley: DROP... YOUR... SWORD!

I realized that my body has been in charge for too long here. It's bullied me long enough. This morning I stood up to my physical pain and discomfort and said, you may be able to hurt me, but you can't slow me down. I gave the pain back to my body. I didn't let it slow me down. I sped up my pace until I was running at the edge of breathing discomfort (no HRM). I did Ashland half in 2:27. Today's projected finish was 2:30 (11:30's), with a possible DNF because of how crappy I've felt lately.

I finished in 2:24. 6 minutes faster than planned. I only walked through water stops, I never stopped running no matter how much I hurt or how much I felt sick. Part way through I got a bunch of chills and didn't like that. But I didn't stop. AND, my last two miles were 10:49 and 10:43. All my miles were 11:10 or less except one where we had a half mile continuous incline (won't call it a hill).

And that's how it's going to be in 2008. I rule my pain. ME. My pain doesn't rule me any fucking more!

Now that I've got that out of the way. Let me tell you some funny stuff, starting with life at the back of the marathon starting line. Not a lot of technical fabric in the back. Lots of cotton tshirts, and not just as coverup against the cold. There were many people running in cotton tshirts. I saw one woman in what looked like purple felt pants or something. People wore all over body clothing, jackets, backpacks. Full faced makeup. I'm talking foundation, powder, *lipstick*. Cell phones galore.

Also, the homeless really make out at this race. People wear long sleeves, pants and all kinds of stuff to the start line and then discard it on the ground or draping it on the barriers. I saw people walking along the barriers, inspecting things and taking the best away with them. Obviously this is a known event for them. I hope folks weren't expecting to get that stuff back.

Did I mention it took 38 minutes for me to get to the start line once the race started? Wow. This race was huge. 20,276 finishers in the half marathon.

I'm totally sunburned.

Jen G did her first marathon today. She finished in 4:42 that little rock star! Said it was the hardest thing she'd ever done and that doing a half-ironman is way easier.

I'd like to come back here. I like Phoenix quite a bit. Too bad it gets so hot in the summer. Otherwise a great place to live.

That's all the tidbits I've got for now. I might have more later when my brain is working again.

fall down, go boom

Yoga this morning. Crow pose. I made it there finally. Then I fell forward on my face and bit my lip. Ow.

Important notes on the crow pose:

Beginners: Try lifting one foot up at a time to get a feel for how far forward you need to bring yourself. Do not let your head drop! This will cause you to tip forward and lose balance. Put a blanket in front of you so you won't be afraid of hitting your head if you fall. Everyone falls when learning this pose.

If only I'd known...

Where am I?

I really am still here. I am spending a lot of time on planes, in cars and sleeping in shitty hotel beds or in my brother's guest bed. Sleeping in other people's guest beds has made me reconsider my own guest bed and wonder just how shitty it is. Maybe it would be more honest to get rid of the futon and just tell people they can blow up an air mattress when they come over. At least that would be more honest than trying to say I have a guest bed, when it's really just a bed so shitty that I'd never sleep in it again, but was too cheap to throw away.

I don't have a lot going on right now. I am trying to find the time to maybe make a personalized domain. I have a domain now and have installed wordpress and maybe will also install gallery. I've got some images I'd like to use in a blog header, but am a complete photoshop 'tard so I have no idea what to do with them. These things are holding me up in doing anything useful.

I signed up for the Training Peaks virtual coach, but am having a hard time getting into the swing of things with almost weekly travel. I need to figure out a strength training routine that can be done in a hotel room. I guess I should buy some of those rubber bands or something. But I don't know how to come up with a plan and don't know how to find a personal trainer who will only work with me for like one session to help me figure out a routine.

I went to a yoga studio yoga class recently instead of a YMCA class. It's getting too hard to work my schedule around the 3 decent yoga classes they have in a week at my level. I also have been exploring yoga podcasts for hotel rooms again. but the carpeted floors are slippery and towels don't work, but my yoga mat doesn't fit into my carry-on.

I am full of dilemmas right now. I am in Ann Arbor right now. I'll be home Friday and am flying to Phoenix for a week on Sunday. I have no idea what to pack. Then I'll be home for a week after that and will be having some anti-baby procedures done and then going back to Ann Arbor the following week. You see why I need a decent weight lifting routine stat? I am all flab.

Happy Holidays UPS

I sent this email back to UPS today:

Dear UPS customer service,

You know what I really hate? When I send an email to a customer service unit of a business and they send me a form letter back without actually answering my question. I hope every customer service person who does this never has a good service experience ever with any business.

Happy Holidays, UPS can bite me.
Sascha

DejaVu Land

I'm tired. Last night I fell asleep still petting the cat and woke up 6 hours later in the exact same position. I was so tired that I even slept that way despite falling asleep on my left side. I never sleep on my left side anymore.

Traveling is getting tougher. It's a bit harder this year than it was last. Last year I was just getting the hang of my job and was probably billing 30 hours a week tops. I'm billing 45-50 hour weeks right now and working or thinking about work more. Now when I travel, sitting in my hotel room after work doesn't mean relaxing. It means crunching to get even more work done.

Even funnier, I'm actually traveling back to Ann Arbor, just like I was last year. Same client, new stuff. The work is interesting and compelling which is what's keeping me from going off my rocker. But it's tough. I have less time for running and stuff. I didn't shovel last Sunday because I was lazy. My most wonderful boyfriend actually shoveled my walk while I was gone this week. These are the things that make me adore him.

As I left for yoga tonight I got bit in the ass as my car got stuck in my unshoveled driveway. No yoga for sascha. But she got a lovely alternative workout by shoveling out the driveway.

Earlier I was on the phone for work and hurriedly getting ready for Yoga. I was just madly unzipping my hoodie to slip on a sports bra when I turned around and found the Simon Delivers guy at the door! I turned my back and re-zipped, got the groceries without too much embarrassment, but it was funny.

clubbing baby seals - the new canadian national pastime

Long John Silvers

Red Lobster

Costco

Walmart

Kroger

Outback SteakHouse

McCormick & Schmicks

We already knew Walmart was evil incarnate. But the rest of these folks could stand to buy their seafood elsewhere. Apparently clubbing and killing of baby seals is a National Pastime for Canadian Fisherman in the off season when they aren't fishing. I'm pretty grossed out by the whole thing. Clubbing baby seals? Who actually wears seal fur? Gross.

Here's the deal: don't buy Canadian seafood. The seafood business from Canada is a billion dollar industry. If we get pissy enough, if we can impact their biggest business, maybe someone will pay attention.

Outback Steakhouse, you're history. So are the rest of those places up top. I plan to give my bidness to places with a little conscience. Whole Foods, Trader Joes, Wild Oats (Colorado), Oceanaire restaurant, I'm all yours.

FREE BEER

I bet that title works better than the last one, huh? I have a 12 pack of Summit Winter, a Mazzer Mini espresso grinder and a Starbucks Barista espresso maker with your name written all over them.

I just realized that I am traveling 15 days in December and at least 8 in January. I have the bf willing to stop by and see to things every so often but I'm suffering some guilt from leaving my pets alone so much when they are used to company. I work from home when I'm not traveling.

I have a great little bungalow with modern heat, one cuddly cat and one chatty cat. There is a king sized bed, cable and wireless internet. Stereo, 32" flat screen tv and dvd player. Take a mini vacay at my house. Let me know if you're interested.

Do you like cats and hate your roommate?

Or something like that.

I just realized that I am traveling 15 days in December and at least 8 in January. I have the bf willing to stop by and see to things every so often but I'm suffering some guilt from leaving my pets alone so much when they are used to company. I work from home when I'm not traveling.

I have a great little bungalow with modern heat, one cuddly cat and one chatty cat. There is a king sized bed, cable and wireless internet. Stereo, 32" flat screen tv and dvd player. Take a mini vacay at my house. Let me know if you're interested.

Your InFlight Annoyance

I haven’t flown in nearly a year. I think the last trip I took was in January to either Miami or San Francisco. Can’t say I’ve missed the experience and I’m not even on the plane yet. The taxi company actually asked me on the phone if I would be using cash or credit, and then they sent me a taxi with a broken credit card machine. Thank You Checker Cab company.

The biggest change in 10 months? No one is standing with the plastic baggies yelling about 3.4 ounce containers and liquids or gels. The baggies are just sitting on a table all forlornly by themselves. And can I just say? TSA policies about having to fit all my liquids and gels in a tiny Ziploc bag is so discriminatory against women. Did you hear that TSA? Discrimination. TSA discriminates. Bastards. All guys need is some Pert and maybe some aftershave. Me? I need hair gel, foundation, face lotion, exfoliant (beta hydroxyl), lipstick (liquid), conditioner, etc. I am going to be at the mercy of hotel conditioner because mine wouldn’t fit. Ditto toothpaste, ditto lotion. I hate you TSA.

Also, it was like the entire TSA staff was on lunch at the same time when I got here. The elite/first class line was as long and slow as the regular line?

At least I have a first class seat whose only real value is that the space guarantees that some guy won’t “accidentally” fall asleep and suck up all my personal space. No touching on the airplane people! Get your stinky hair products out of my personal space. And no you aren’t allowed to use both freaking arm rests. Stop being such a space hog. Sheesh!

Yeah, can’t say I miss flying. I like road trips. Especially these days because my boyfriend thinks I’m too inattentive a driver, so he prefers to drive most of the time 

On the plus side, my PM from my last project lives where I’m going and he’s got a line on the best sushi in town. So maybe things won’t suck entirely.

Hello Stupidandpointless, Meet Beatupandwornout

As I sit here stretching and drinking a coke after my most recent failed run, I am reaching agreement with the thoughts I had when I cut the run short. I was supposed to run 18 miles today and was really worn out by the time I'd done 12. This made me really start thinking about what I'm accomplishing here. My entire training season has been a case of "almost", and "not quite." This has been the case since my very first "long run" of 7 miles in July where I cramped up at 6.5 miles.

I am not meeting my training requirements for long distance running this year. And what is this really getting me? Not only is it stupid and pointless, and not only do I constantly feel beat up and worn out, but mentally I feel like shit. Last week I needed 17 miles but I only did 16. Two weeks ago I needed 15 but ended up with 13.8, although it was because I can't add simple numbers that week. Before that I had to do 14 and was sick and could be barely make it home the last two miles. Today I finished with 14 after consciously taking a look at my training activity over the last few months and thinking to myself, "Self, this is stupid and pointless. You are just beating yourself up and making yourself feel like crap when you don't do what you're supposed to do."

I want more time for weight lifting. I want more time for yoga. Preparing for a marathon was a good way last year to maintain some fitness. But I have to tell you, trying to train for a marathon AND lose weight? It's not such a great plan.

I am also tired of trying to work out my running schedule around my travel schedule. I had to skip Jingle Cross this weekend so I could come home and run in a familiar environment. I was going to have to figure out a long route in December while home visiting for Christmas. Traveling to KC for Cross Nats was cramping my style because of my running schedule. I am traveling for work 3 times in the next 7 weeks as well and it makes it a bit of a nightmare to run long (anything over 6 miles is long in my mind) in the middle of the week.

So here's what I'm going to do:

Instead of living in denial and beating myself up over this shit, I am downgrading my plans for Phoenix to a half marathon distance. I have 7 weeks to that date. With the base I've built since July, I am in fine shape for a half marathon. This will allow me to run my 3 hard runs a week but it will also keep me from feeling like shit on Monday mornings. This is not necessarily going to reduce my time commitment for the next two months; and it might even make it more challenging. With somewhat shorter runs in store for me, I can get 2-3 trainer rides in at the crack of dawn each week, 2 weight sessions and 2 yoga session and probably toss a couple of swims in there as well (although that's presenting its own motivational issues at the moment as well).

It's not going to be any easier, but the distances will be more manageable and my goal will be to better my Ashland time by a smidge. And if the weather is nice, I might even take revenge on the Winter Carnival half marathon the next week when I come back from Phoenix.

So instead of my last 8 weeks looking like this: 18/15/20/15/20/13/10/26.2, They now looking like this: 14/14/10/15/10/12/8/13.1. But my weekday runs are shorter as well. They only go up to 5-6 miles instead of 6-10 miles. I never wanted to run marathons anyway. I'm not sure what I'm going to do next fall when the offseason hits again. I might be ready to tackle a marathon again. Or maybe I'll find a winter half-ironman instead. Who knows.

Something New?

My blog is approaching its third birthday. I've been feeling boring and uninspired lately. Yet another post about my run du jour or another bike adventure is not motivating me. I think of things I'd like to blog about when I'm out and about, but am not motivated to tap it out on the keypad when I get home. What to do? I think this blog is becoming too age-ed. Boring. It's boring for me. It's boring for you.

The blog here really started picking up speed 3 years ago when I broke up with a boyfriend who drove me crazy and had been the catalyst that kept my road bike in the basement that whole summer. Not joking. In my supreme insane desire to ride my bike at any cost, I started riding my bike in December and winter commuting to work. I had lots to talk about. Thus were born the Smurfette Reports. As new adventures came, I blogged them with great enthusiasm. I think I'm in a transitional stage here with no great bloggable adventures. Some things just can't be blogged and some things I don't want to share and some things don't motivate me to share.

What's a girl to do? I'm not sure yet. I don't think I'll quit blogging. I enjoy it and it's an outlet for telling stories about stuff that otherwise have no place to go. I think I've outgrown blogger though and am thinking about moving on to something else. Mostly I'm just pondering at this point...I did register a new domain though...

ponderponder...

Picking up the Pace

Things are not slowing down around here. I was working like crazy on my last local client thinking that the end was in site and I could indulge in some well earned slack time. Silly Sascha. I had indicated to management that I was bored and looking for something new anyway, and hey, they found me something. For two weeks now I have been reassigned to our Ann Arbor client that I worked on last year. And still trying to finish up work on the other client.

This has been resulting in many 10 and 12 hour days where the only leisure I get is where I grab it in both hands, snarling at my co-workers and go spend an hour or two running, lifting or yoga-ing. Simon Delivers is my new best friend and if I didn't have a dishwasher I'd be washing a dish every time I wanted to use it. I actually had so much laundry yesterday that I was able to divide it into 3 loads and was in danger of not being able to run because I'd used up all my sports bras.

My cats are completely spoiled by the fact that I'm working at home all the time. If I ever have to go to an office again, they'll probably throw a tantrum.

I'm driving to Iowa for Thanksgiving, but logistics are becoming so messed up that I'm coming home on Friday night instead of going to Jingle Cross to cheer. Dating our cat sitter was probably not the brightest thing for either us. Now we have to go looking far and wide when we want to leave town together. Plus I have to run 18 miles next Sunday and will be hopping on a plane two days later to spend time in Ann Arbor. Too much away from home, living out of a suitcase makes Sascha cranky.

I will also be in Ann Arbor just before Christmas. And so, for the first time in many years, I will actually spending Christmas with my family instead of doing some random house project. It will probably blizzard. That's one of the reasons I quit going home over the holidays. I did it the first two years I lived here and it blizzarded both times. Once I drove my 10 year old Oldsmobile home and thought I was going to die. The next year I flew and couldn't get home because of snow so massive they called out the national guard in Detroit. And that was the last time I went home in December.

It's kind of a busy time. I feel bad sending Steven off to Jingle Cross by himself although his feelings aren't hurt. If it were me I would be feeling all forlorn that I was being abandoned to go race by myself for two days in a strange city and stay in a hotel by myself. Good thing boys are so much more resilient.

I went to the doctor yesterday to see if I had pink eye. He says it's just eyestrain.

I've been looking on the web for pink Orbea bar tape and can't find any to buy. Hello, Orbea? Where is the pink bar tape? Sascha likey. Sascha wanty.

So what are you really trying to say?

So I’ve been shopping for a condo for next summer’s trip to Colorado. Vrbo.com is a good site, but it could benefit from some search engine updates. It would be nice to be able to specify more criteria than just city and a “sort by” function. I have certain things that I would very much like next time.

These are based on prior experience and were things that I missed or wished for the last two years. I want a gas grill. I want to be able to grill my protein after long bike rides and I don’t want to fuck around with charcoal. Last year our rental said there was a grill and there was a tiny propane grill but we weren’t allowed to use it and that the management company just hadn’t gotten around to removing it yet. Which was ok because it appeared to have never been cleaned.

I’d like a king sized bed. When you’re beat up from riding or hiking all day, the last thing you want to do is worry about where you are in the bed and if you’re hogging too much or feel cramped and want to spread out. I’d settle for a queen though.

I’d like a private hot tub. I’d like to be able to get naked in the hot tub after a long day without other people around. Even if anyone else comes out to Colorado, they’d better be good enough friends that nudity is not an issue or they’d just better not have a lot of body modesty. Because I am not using a swim suit.

I’d like two bathrooms so there’s less fighting over who gets the bathroom/shower first after riding.

I required VS/OLN. I am never going to rent a condo in July again without ascertaining that it indeed has Tour de France coverage.

So I’m reading through the ads on vrbo and learning to read between the lines when deciphering headlines. Words can be deceptive and mean many things. Here are some of my interpretations. What do you think?

Cozy – this place is so tiny you will trip over each other if you try to walk around at the same time

Charming – we haven’t updated this baby since 1982

Cabin décor – we’ve been using the condo as a dumping ground for our ugly, beat up old furniture when we get new pieces

Studio – sleeps 6 – huh? Wtf? Only if you don’t bring any luggage.

Prestigious “development” – you obviously know nothing about this area and I am going to exploit your desire for status with an outright lie. This condo actually backs up onto a construction site that is designed to obstruct any view, keep you from sleeping past 6am and coat everything you own with dust

Luxury condo– double beds, hot tubs in clubhouses and an update in 2001 do not a luxury condo make. But I bet we can fool you into thinking so by using the word “luxury” and inflating our rate up 20% from other comparable condos

Exceptional Value – this condo is cheap. So cheap that you’ll be lucky to get hot water at peak times or have all four burners on the stove work

WiFi (in clubhouse) – wtf? Wifi in clubhouse? That’s not going to cut it people. Seriously, get with the program and offer it in the condo.

Dialup Internet provided – what’s that? You’re joking right?

Brand new $3 million dollar club house – this place is a dump but heeeeeyyy, check out the clubhouse!

Kid-friendly – we have a bunch of shitty games and toys with missing pieces left here by other people that your kids can drive you crazy with. And there will be lots of people with annoying, pooly behaved children staying here.

Media Library – 6 appallingly bad DVD’s or ratty old VHS tapes like Home Alone III, Some Ben/Jen chick flick and Thomas the Tank tape.

No pictures in the ad – um, many years of vacationers have trashed our condo and we don’t want you to know what it looks like. Just pay us some freaking money.

Deluxe – we have everything you’ll get in every other condo, but it sounds cool doesn’t it!

Upscale – all the furniture matches

Awesome view! – this place is a dump but we can charge you twice what it’s worth because you can see a mountain out the window

Rustic wood decor – we bought all this shit cheap when one of the local hotels remodeled a few years ago. And the mattresses too!

Penthouse condo – our condo is on the top floor and there’s no elevator sucker!

Copper Mountain condos: These condos should not be charging anything for summer occupancy. There’s no grocery store in Copper. You have to go to Frisco to get a SuperValu and to get a real Grocery you have to drive all the way to Silverthorne. And everything is built right on top of everything else. It’s like 90 square feet with 30 different condo high rises built right on top of each other. And a starbucks. In the winter it’s great because it’s got a zillion different lifts right next door to the high rises, but it’s nothing to speak of for summer rentals. And yet these buildings are charging at rates like Breckenridge which has a main street, grocery store, a zillion bars and restaurants, the Blue River. I don’t get it.

My hope is to find something reasonably cozy that has a private hot tub and maybe a second bedroom in case anyone else decides they might want to come this summer. I’ve seen a few likely candidates but most of the stuff I’ve read has been pretty funny. Here’s hoping!

Blade Runner

Many years ago I lived in a house full of nerds. They were all 4 male nerds. They made me a nerd too. Not that I wasn't already on the way to being one. I mean, when you grow in a house with more books than shelf space, an audiophile for a father and who also had shelves full of war games and other games, you can't help but grow up with ubernerd stamped on your forehead. I think "dice" and "counters" were some of the first words out of my mouth. Some of my best memories as a child are when I got to stay up late with the grownups and play Runequest.

Ub-Er-nerd. I am serious. We had a TRS-80 with a tape player.

So it's no wonder I fell in with a bad crowd as soon as I left home. These guys were all students at Michigan State and had a common bond of being part of college radio. One of them was my boyfriend which is how I fell in with them. They liked Tv. They liked video games. They liked conspiracy theories. I wish I had a picture of our living room from then. It had built-ins on one end of the room and there were two tv's. One on each side of the room. There were three beat up skanky couches around the area with a big old square table in the middle. One TV was for playing Nintendo and one TV always had movies going in the VCR.

Repo Man was a favorite. Buckaroo Bonzai was another. And of course, Star Wars. I was a closet nerd in a lot of ways back then. I grew up reading sci-fi and fantasy novels but I'd always been disdainful of TV and sci-fi movies. I came to realize that I'd never really given Star Wars a chance. I learned to love it. The couple years I spent there opened my mind to a lot of things I'd disdained before. I can quote Star Wars now from just about any place in the movie. Not quite so much with the other two, but at least a little bit. I know why the Empire Strikes Back is the best movie of the three. I learned to appreciate darkness and angst. Depressed roommates who play Tom Waits for days on end will help with that.

For a long time, I thought I loved Harrison Ford. Then I saw him in some annoying Tom Clancy films and other such crap and realized that, it wasn't Harrison Ford I adored at all. It was Han Solo. But not just Han Solo; I also adored Rick Deckard - the tired and cynical yet conflicted hunter of Replicants in the classic film Blade Runner.

I cannot even being to say how much I love this film. The soundtrack is superb and the sadness, the angst, the anger, all of the emotions are overpowering. This is seriously one of the most powerful movies made. We often don't think of sci-fi as poignant or emotionally profound, but Blade Runner is both of these things and so much more. But you probably all know this. I'm pretty sure my blog reader demographics are mostly made up of other nerdy types. So I'll stop preaching to the choir and get to my point.

The other night when we were at the Uptown to see Control, a trailer came on for the new Director's Cut of Blade Runner. It's showing at the Uptown at Midnight on December 1st. I got super excited. I got all bouncy and looked at Steven wondering if he'd want to go. Turned out he didn't even know what movie was being trailed. My boyfriend has never seen Blade Runner. It's a good think I was sitting down at the time or I might have fallen over. I didn't know there were people out there our age who hadn't seen it. Apparently there are a few. If you haven't seen it, you really should. We're going to the Uptown on the 1st of December to see it. Then there will be one less non-Blade Runner seer out as well as one happier Sascha. The best part for me? I've never seen it on a big screen. Happy Sigh.

Control

I've had the song haunting my brain and lingering for the last few days. Joy Division had a huge impact on the music of the 80's. They were one of the many parents of goth. They made music before the Sisters of Mercy - First and Last and Always wasn't even released until 1985, 5 years after the death of Ian Curtis and their sound influenced much of the early goth scene. On top of that, the rest of Joy Division grew up to be the band New Order who just about everyone has heard of by now.

Saturday we went over to the Uptown Theater to see the movie Control. It's kind of like required viewing for all old school punks/goths/wannabes. Control chronicles the (very short)life of Ian Curtis, the lead singer of Joy Division. It views kind of like a montage or series of pivotal moments in his life set to a greatest hits soundtrack. In the film, Ian progresses from a fresh faced youth who paints on eyeliner to a hollowed-eyed, exhausted, sick and confused twentysomething dealing with a wife, a child, a lover and epilepsy. The epilepsy is exacerbated by his rockstar lifestyle; long days and nights, touring, drinking, general exhaustion.

I never knew Ian Curtis had epilepsy. And somehow many years ago, I'd heard somewhere that he'd hung himself with a piano wire. I spent most of the film wondering where he was going to find one of those since there were no pianos in evidence. Obviously someone was mistaken about that piano wire.

His bouts with epilepsy gave him a little credibility in my eyes. Otherwise he would have been just another self-centered, depressed twenty-something writing dark poetry and taking the people around him for granted, treating his wife like shit and asking her what his lover had to do with their marriage. Great poets tend to be self-obsessed jerks. It's just one of those things. Of course, a lot of bad poets tend to be self-obsessed jerks too.

But that's the nature of personal art. You need to feel something strongly enough that you are compelled to make an external monument to your feelings (music, poetry, books, whatever). And if you're happy, 9 times out of 10, you're too busy being happy to write poetry about it or write it down at all. It's the poor, unhappy, the obsessed, the angry, the forsaken, the dumped that leave us with the legacy of their pain. And that works out well, because when the rest of us are happy, we're not looking for external comfort or validation. But when we're lost, confused or hurt or unhappy, it's then that the poets and their pain really speak to us. It gives us something to touch, something to relate to, something to help us figure out that we aren't the only ones who have felt this way. Often, just this revelation is enough for us to get through it. And so we have to look at the angst-ridden poets of our time and before and give them a little credit.

He may not have been the best husband or dad, but Ian Curtis, and Joy Division, left us with a legacy rich in emotional depth and originality that will be with us for a long time. The film was shot in black and white and was visually quite striking. I also thought it was well acted and objectively portrayed the players as real people playing the cards they'd been dealt. It doesn't villainize, demonize or simplify things. I recommend getting out to see it if you're any kind of fan.

sicko

I don't get sick often. And if I do, it's the kind of run down sick that doesn't do much besides slow you down. I've been feeling pretty unmotivated this weekend and didn't do much on Saturday despite it being a beautiful day. I rode my trainer 30 minutes. Stayed inside because my knee was bothering me and didn't want to mess it up for my Sunday long run.

Sunday I was scheduled to run 15 miles. I had a hard time getting motivated despite the fact that Saturday evening's entertainment consisted of us going to a movie and then me falling asleep in bed with all my clothes on and an extra afghan while Steven made dinner.

I had a terrible time getting motivated to run 15 miles (read 3 hours). Nice day and I knew I could do it, since I'd done it all last year already. I finally got out of